One of my first stops when I wake up each morning is Capitol Ideas. Why? Because John Micek provides a take on state government that frequently makes me laugh while simultaneously leaves me wanting to bang my head against a wall wondering what the hell we are doing. Take this bit:
We Are Reliably Informed …
… that Lt. Gov. Jim Cawley is off to Washington D.C. today for some kind of national conference for lieutenant governors.
What do you suppose they talk about at events like this? We can only imagine the agenda …
9:30 a.m: The Governor’s Pulse, Where It Is. How To Check It.
11 a.m: Lunch, It Really Can Last Three Hours.
11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m.: Lunch
2:30 p.m.-3:30 p.m: The Value Of Learning A Trade (participants may choose from workshops on welding, needlework and foodservice).
4 p.m.: Dismissal and Happy Hour.
To be fair to Lt. Gov. Cawley, Micek did leave off the Group Photo Session scheduled between 12-12:10pm. He also missed the fact that the Happy Hours are with the Canadians & Irish. But don’t believe that they won’t be tackling at least some of the big issues of the day. Check out this list of resolutions they plan to tackle:
- Resolution Affirming the Importance of Folic Acid in the Diets of Women of Childbearing Age
- Resolution in Support of ‘Your Heart is in Your Hands’ Cardiovascular Awareness Campaign
- Resolution to End Corporal Punishment in Public Schools
I don’t know if Pennsylvania even has corporal punishment in schools, but that could be somewhat interesting. We had sexist corporal punishment in my high school. When boys got in trouble, they could be paddled or take detention. Girls could only take detention. I wish I had gotten in enough trouble to warrant punishment so I could have sued them. For the record, I’m in no way opposed to corporal punishment. In this day and age, it should really be an option as opposed to a default punishment.
Our Lieutenant Governor could teach a break-out session; she makes her own clothes, including the suit she wore to the inauguration.
That probably sounds really folksy, and she is, but her main qualification is that she never changed her last name, so you can still tell that she’s the daughter of the beloved left-wing end of the Axis of Bow-Ties, Paul Simon.
“Resolution in Support of ‘Your Heart is in Your Hands’ Cardiovascular Awareness Campaign”
That sounds kind of messy, to be honest. But I guess better my heart being in MY hands, instead of the hands of someone else.