Category: Funny

This is hilarious:

Once upon a time, there was a little State called New York.  And in this land lived a lot of witches. One day the biggest witch, Hillary Clinton announced that she was leaving and going to the White House where she could personally service the King.  That left another witch happy and wringing her hands. “Surely without Hillary I am now the fairest of all the New York reps” thought witch McCarthy.  So she went to her magic mirror and prayed, “mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest New York Congress critter of them all?” As she sat there in glee waiting for the expected answer, she was almost knocked to the floor when Chucky Schumer appeared in the mirror and pronounced “why it is representative Kirsten Gillibrand of course!”

It just gets better from there.

… that’s funny right there.

Sandcastle Scrolls has an idea of what our theme song needs to be for the next four years.

The Newbie Shooter is now officially southern.

We’ve talked about Jerry Patterson, the Texas Land Comissioner, before.  This time he’s taking a dim view of running for U.S. Senate if Kay Bailey Hutchinson runs for Governer:

“Just like Johnny Cash, I’d definitely take my guns to town,” Patterson said. “Living in D.C. would be tough only because of the lack of gun ranges and available ammunition.”

Paraphrasing his quote from a recent West Texas land controversy, Patterson added “No guns, no hunting, no Senate.”

That is perhaps the best reason I have ever heard from a politician for not running for an office.  Read the whole thing.  It’s a hoot.

Hopefully this will make you guys crack a smile.  It’s cheesy, but it’s an amusing take on the shoe throwing incident of 2008.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ua05RTaDE8o[/youtube]

If you have never heard of Nigella Lawson before, you’ll start to fall in love with her right now.  If she didn’t live in London, some of you might volunteer to go protect her since she recently pissed off ALF and PETA.

When asked on BBC1’s The One show if she thought the fashion industry should outlaw fur, Nigella replied that she would wear it if she could kill the animal herself. …

Then she made a stabbing motion and added, “Going into a shop and buying a fur coat would be an act of weakness. But if I could go into the woods and kill a bear myself, I would wear it proudly as a trophy.’’

ALF just named her a “legitimate target” according to one outfit.  PETA seems more sane by simply saying her comments make her unattractive.  I’ll let you guys decide if they are right.

I knew a woman who trapped the foxes that made up her vest.  I admit, I think it would be pretty cool to have a fur jacket that I caught myself.

I don’t care what you think of Obama, this is funny.

Source here.

This billboard is sure to make some PETA members puke their tofu lunch all over their steering wheel: